Beetlejuice Beetlejuice: Hurawatch

Beetlejuice Beetlejuice: Hurawatch

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Beetlejuice is a movie whose existence still baffles me. I’ve heard that it was in the works when I was a child, and look, it’s finally here. Even now, saying that feels like the world is shifting somehow. Somehow, it feels like everything is in motion just because of that statement. They did it. They made a sequel. The next part is arguably more difficult. Was it good? Burton films really are hit or miss post 90s. Sadly, this film only adds to the collection. I’ll admit that he had, at almost, his best visual effects and I have to give him that, but…it is just a shame that the writing, especially and comprehensively, is awful but shockingly horrid—abysmal because you have to see what they attempted and how they failed so incredibly at the term… um… ahaha… I remembered it: succeeding. Here it is: a review of Beetlejuice’s long awaited sequel. “Beware ye who enter here” (Dante) or, for real, don’t enter the film because it isn’t worth all this anticipation. And that is actually quite sad.

Let’s begin with the tale at hand. To cut the story down quite a bit (as in 26 pages for this convoluted film), this is a family film… One should sympathize with anyone having to write a summary for this film, because, its a family film at heart just like the original which had spectacular visuals, but was more spread out in terms of its thematic purpose. Here, however, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice is pretty blunt, and also somewhat scattered into a million pieces plot-wise. Thus, we see Lydia, who is old now and a fake ghost seer for the public for some reason. Older women exploiting her and her daughter also despises her. So, she’s lost her some ex husband who has done wonders for her daughter and dad who is dead and step mom who is a lot but her and her mom still argue so now her Astrid for like one scene says something like... “you’re a grown-up” which is like, you’re a grown-up but not an annoying goth anymore, which, I mean, that’s called growing up, but okay.

Likewise, a detective is assigned to the case, while Delores, Beetlejuice's wife, seeks Astrid with deadly intent. I nearly forgot to mention that Astrid has this sociopathic boyfriend who happens to be dead and attempts to take over her life. Additionally, Astrid's father resides in the underworld, and they were trying to help her when they encountered him. Then, Emily dies, and now she has to come to terms with that, along with a couple dozen other things I forgot. Oh, and as far as I remember, Lydia makes a promise to help Beetlejuice save Astrid.

Did you grasp all of that? Frankly, it attempts to spread out and be organized. It just fails horrendously. Regardless, one thing is clear: this is a family matter. While this by itself isn't too terrible, it isn’t how it’s all laid out. You can see the outline here. This doesn't sound bad on its own, but instead, it is how it is written.

While I usually commend Burton’s films for not being the most awful experience ever, this time, it really is the worst thing about the film. It’s how you're left rolling your eyes.

This story arc is all over the place, feels generic, and comes off like it was written in two minutes, to be honest. For example, why does it seem like it has to follow the original film, like most sequels, remakes, reboots, and do forever tried to, copying instead of placing focus on something unique? What if you took the relationship of a mother and daughter and made that the entire feature, completely exluding Beetlejuice so you know you can crowd into that? If you really, needed Beetlejuice, then do something different. I don’t know, in my opinion, the simplest things are the most dramatic. In my view, the original film seemed like it was trying to pul every single aspect into one, avoiding at all costs what it should have felt like – too much all at once.

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What stands out the most in this sequel is they have no boundaries. The genius behind the original movies charm comes from the stunning ability to Drean’s Foolishness was superb becasue not having all the cards on the table at once was what made the magic. The Neitherworld, when exposed, was always imposing, yes, creepy yet, absurdly funny. That was the power of it.

Flanderization occurs when a character's defining trait is taken to an extreme. This happens in sequels when only one aspect of the original film is taken into consideration and the rest ignored. The result is almost always a sequel that is a failure. If I had to cite my favorite example, it is when the Neitherworld had such great potential as a truly mysterious and engaging place that gives rise to so many questions due to the first film, and this film had but two options: either answer all, which is clearly detrimental, or expand the world to a point it becomes dull.

Now, to be caps-locked frank, Beetlejuice Beetlejuice is a mid movie. And to be more specific, as a sequel, it is an absolute garbage dog water dumpster fire sequel. As far as standalone films go, this one offers a solid albeit chaotic and convoluted, as well as poorly paced, interweaving plot that resolves somewhat adequately. Well... until the awful conclusion. But what really drags it down is its lack of coherence and consistency, if I may be blunt, its soul and equilibrium.

The reveal that Lydia marries Beetlejuice is where the film loses me. Spoilers, I know. But could this all be a dream? Sure. Just that revelation alone ruins everything for me. It directly goes against the warm and wholesome vibes of the marriage and them moving on with their lives. It feels as if all of that work is tossed aside for a cheap laugh, especially considering we know if a sequel does come, it definitely won’t be made by Burton. The film wraps up in a way that, for me, feels like an outright insult to the first film.

Honestly, I think this film has an out-there charm that makes it more heartwarming than the original. But I totally get why this is seen as an issue; it feels as if the first film had a specific structure and was tight. This sequel feels unbelievably blunt and devoid of subtlety. Of course the original was over-the-top, but it approached topics like how death affects people, moving on, and enjoying life in a heartfelt manner. The couple, who are our protagonists, die a horrific death and are seemingly trapped forever in a house that someone usurps.

However, Burton still manages to portray, at least for me, that regardless of how often life feels like it has no point and that we all, yes, enjoy life and die; one can rejoice for the sake of being happy. And that felt good. This was even better with the parental involvement that the Maitlands had for Lydia and how they literally rescued her from having to marry Beetlejuice. It was a creatively wonderful landscape teeming with a heart that was in the right place. In Beetlejuice Beetlejuice, Lydia, if we take it not as a dream, is married to Beetlejuice.

Back to Lydia marrying Beetlejuice; If you are familiar with this franchise, you know exactly why this is an awful decision. Said no one ever. Instead of granting her agency and respecting this character because of the gap in years, the ending feels like utter denial regarding surrendering to fulfilling the wish for to a dumpster fire of a conclusion. That ruins absolutely everything. Like a house itself, or in this case the entire film, bursting with flames and celebrating at that.

In contrast, Beetlejuice Beetlejuice seems to copy the original plot rather than depicting the cycle of family dynamics it attempts to with Lydia, much like her mother-in-law before. She struggles with being a mother to her daughter. Yet, it feels lazy. Lydia should be around 40 now, but it does feel like the writers are not making an effort, and not to mention, it seems like the writing is coming from 80-year-olds who are completely out of touch with real parental dynamics.

When it comes to humor, this time around it’s less laugh out loud funny and more just rolling your eyes, oh my god funny. It’s humor aimed at people who were actually young adults when Beetlejuice was released. You guessed it, 36 years ago. Not for those born, let’s say, dubious later on. Even Ortega’s lines feel as though they were written by someone 95, completely devoid of any attempt at realism.